It's funny, I wasn't planning on doing a blog post today. I'd thought about it, but decided that the pictures I put up of my dad on Facebook and Twitter, and their accompanying posts were a sufficient enough way to mark the 12th anniversary of his passing today. Then, it happened.
I saw the news on my Twitter feed and couldn't believe what I was seeing. The rumors were flying, and then, unfortunately, the rumors turned into fact. Tiaina Baul Seau, Jr., was dead of an apparent self-inflicted gunshot wound. For any Chargers fan, especially those of us who remember seeing Junior play and how much he meant to his hometown community, it was like a punch in the gut.
Oh, when I first knew about Junior Seau, I hated him. He went to Oceanside High, a rival of Ramona. And, they kicked our asses. Then, he went to USC, and lo and behold, the Chargers wound up drafting the hometown boy. And, he became, arguably, the most popular Charger in the franchise's history.
Now, yes, Junior was a hero, a sports hero, a community hero, and someone that I looked up to in that regard. Obviously, my dad was my hero in a much different, way, much like Junior was hero to his own three children.
And, this is where it gets tough. We won't know what drove Junior to commit suicide (as is the primary theory currently). We'll all remember the smiling player on the sidelines, the charge and full speed he brought to each and every game, the community activist who tried to make his hometown of Oceanside and San Diego better.
What we won't see, as long as the press stays the hell away from them, is his children trying to figure out why their dad, their hero is gone. My heart breaks for them. I lost my dad right before I turned 30, and it devastated me. Junior was 43. One year older than me. I look at my young kids and it scares me to think of leaving them.
The first thing I did tonight when I saw my boys was give them a huge hug and a kiss. I didn't tell them why the hug was a little longer than normal. Just told them that daddy loved them. Anytime one loses a parent sucks. To lose one at such a young age, and to those circumstances, is unfathomable.
Rest In Peace, Junior. Rest in Peace, dad. You both inspired me in different ways, and will continue to do so even though you're not with us anymore.
